Honest Birthday Wishes

After I posted photos on Tuesday detailing my efforts to descend into madness make Graham's cake, I noticed at least five other posts on my Facebook news feed from parents with sweet, tender messages to their children on their birthdays.

Nine years ago today my wonderful daughter was born.  Not a day has gone by that I haven't loved you more than the last.  Your hair is spun gold and your eyes like deep pools of chlorinated water.  I am so proud of you, my angel.  Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday, Graham!  I like your one missing shoe in this photo.  It's okay that I asked you six times to put it on- you must have know what a good photo op it would make.  My mistake!

That's lovely.  It really is.  But despite telling my kids how much I love them everyday, I'm not the saccharine, overly emotional type on social media.  And truth be told, not every day feels like a miracle when you're a mother.  Sometimes you just want to buy something for yourself but can't because you need diapers, and sometimes you feel like exploding because your five year old locks the door to use the bathroom but you get an audience.  Sometimes you hit your limit and need a break, but can't get one.

And sometimes you feel like being honest on Facebook.

So yesterday I refrained from commenting about how Adler turned four months old, and how amazed by him I am everyday (which I am).  I didn't share how the kisses he rewarded me with were among the sweetest I'd ever had (which they were) or how I can't possibly imagine our family being complete without him (which I can't).

Instead, I'll just say this:

Happy 4 months, Adler!  You have taught me so much in such a short time.  I had no idea your tiny body could produce so many fluids, or that you could shoot them out with such force!  Congratulations for that.  I was also unaware that by having three boys I now present myself as certifiably insane in the minds of some of my peers.  How cool!  I was due for a makeover. 

I have so many dreams for your future.  One day, I imagine that you will let me cook dinner without crying.  Maybe I could even feed you something that you didn't acquire by sucking on my appendages until they were raw.  Fingers crossed!  Wouldn't it be great if you grew to be super successful and decided to return the favor to ol' Mom and Dad?  Put me down for a trip to Barbados.

So here's to the next four months, and the many laughs we'll share together.  I love you!
Love, Mom